A Packed Weekend In York‏

"How the hell can a turd survive for over a thousand years?" Keith stared at the perfectly preserved poo, one of the most remarkable finds on display at the Jorvik Viking Centre in York. The unbreakable poo was unearthed in the city's Coppergate. The name comes from the Viking for 'street of the cup-makers', but judging by what we were looking at, they were pretty solid stool-makers as well.  

York is steeped in history. It was the site of one of the three permanent Roman fortresses in the UK - coincidentally we'd recently visited one of the other two, Caerleon. The fortress remains were discovered, buried beneath York Minister, during some work to stabilise the cathedral's foundations. The Minster itself dates back to 1220 and is famous for its 128 intricate stained-glass windows and elaborately carved Choir Screen. One of the biggest windows is being restored and we were able to see some of the 'before' and 'after' examples in a special exhibition in the "Orb" at one end of the Minister.  

 It was the day before the Remembrance Day service and the Minster was filled with music. The orchestra's melodies followed us as we explored the Nave, the spectral tune of the organ seeped into the crypt while we visited the Roman ruins and the sounds of the choir echoed around the altar. The combinations were quite overwhelming.  

There's no shortage of things to see and do in York, so Jan had carefully planned our days with route maps to maximise our experience in the time available. It was almost non-stop. After arriving around lunchtime on Saturday, we started with a stroll into town through the beautiful Museum Gardens, pausing to watch the squirrels foraging for a few final titbits before hibernating. 

Then it was over to The Shambles, one of York's oldest streets with its overhanging half-timbered shops, for a delicious, warming parsnip soup and pulled pork roll at the tiny Shambles Kitchen, the number one restaurant on TripAdvisor. It only had ten seats and two things on the menu. 

From there we headed to the Mansion House (the oldest in the UK) and an interesting, if drawn out, guided tour. We were last to leave which the old boy showing us around, took to mean we wanted more. With a nod and a wink he opened the hidden door to show us the kitchens down below. A special treat indeed! 

 After a quick look around the craft fair in the Guildhall, we headed over to the Haunted House for a ghostly tour. Although not really scary, it was actually quite interesting to hear the stories and the rickety old building was fascinating to explore. The house is supposed to be one of the most spiritually active and has even been on the UK TV series Most Haunted. It's a pity that some of the others wandering around the house didn't get into the spirit. One girl even had her phone light on through a pitch black mock seance, ruining the mood. She was probably scared of the dark. 

 By the time we came out we were rather dry in the mouth, so popped over the road into the Old Starre Inn, built in 1644, for a well-earned drink. Pivni - the World Beer Freehouse - also caught our eye so we nipped in for a sample there too. Not really wanting to go back to our hotel and then, virtually, come straight out again, we tried to get into the restaurant we had booked early. Unfortunately it was packed so with no other option we headed to another 17th century pub, the Royal Oak, for another 'aperitif'. A TV in the corner was showing a rugby match with one team in red and the other in green. In the top left corner it said 'WAL 15 : 24 RSA' "Oh, who's playing South Africa?" asked Jan. You've got to love her. 

 The following morning, we woke to clear, blue skies and bright sunshine, so headed out for a full day's sightseeing. First stop was the York Chocolate Story and a guided tour of the exhibition. It was a real highlight, with an enthusiastic guide, clever talking paintings, a chance to make your own chocolate lollipop and, best of all, lots of tasters. Apart from being reminded that chocolate started off as a cold, chilli infused drink (like the one we'd tasted at Dyrham Park), another interesting thing we learned was that virtually all the big chocolate companies - Roundtree's, Terry's Cadbury's, Fry's etc - were founded by Quakers. Only 1 in 1400 people was a Quaker at the time, but they got into promoting drinking chocolate as an alternative to the alcohol and drunkenness they abhorred. Their honesty, trustworthiness and social responsibility to their workers contributed strongly to their success. 

After the chocolate fix we made our way to the York Dungeon, ruing the fact that our pre-planned, packed agenda meant we'd have to miss the Remembrance Day procession. But as we waited in the queue to go enter the Dungeon, it passed right by the door.

The York Dungeon visit was a very enjoyable experience watching the resident young actors throwing themselves enthusiastically into their roles as blood-thirsty executioner, mad doctor's assistant, scary barmaid, hanging judge, sadistic torturer and dandy highwayman with gusto. Keith was hauled into the act when he was pulled on stage to have his head chopped off. When the axe fell, the lights went out and blood (water) splashed the tour group, prompting more screams. 

 Lunch was taken on the run - a chicken bake from Greggs - on the way to Clifford Tower, the last remnant of York Castle. The view from the top, over the medieval city, was quite spectacular. 

Next to it is the York Castle Museum which Keith remembered visiting as a boy. The reconstructed Victorian street - Kirkgate - is particularly impressive, helped by a few people in costume. They have also added an 1960's street, complete with toys we both remembered as children.

The sun was going down by the time we left, and we only just got into the Jorvik Viking Museum in time. It contains some of the best preserved Viking remains ever found, including that remarkable poo and a life-sized reconstruction of a Viking village which you travel through sat in a gondola like a theme park ride. It's a bit cheesy but good fun. But it was the "Richard the Third" - cockney rhyming slang and coincidentally also another museum in York that we didn't have time to get to - that left the biggest impression. How could a turd last for a millennia when virtually everything around it had rotted away? Those Vikings could not only rape and pillage. They could shit a brick.